Friday, March 30, 2007

Women are from Venus II

Thanks to my spouse who has gifted me this laptop which out of all the desires has carved an inspiration to write and recapitulate every moment that i have lived hitherto towards the completion of this relentless journey.
I could have titled this as "Women are from Venus II" ; but this is no way a creation authored intelligently. I would call it an experience to share with those who sail in the same boat and would want to learn from it. This is a tribute and a celebration to the spirit of being a women. The finesse and aura that can command a scintillating effect and still rule a million hearts. The small things that hardly ever get noticed yet have a power packed impact.
This is dedicated to Anuj my best friend and husband who has by all means stood by my side and is the real inspiration that has eventually sprouted the conviction behind this.
I fondly remember my mother often telling me that if she got a chance to write, she would write an autobiography.about her life.
She stills maintains a diary.. and preserves it as the most beautiful possesion that would inspire her always beyond imagination anout the fond memories....but there is still a lot that she cannot and would not possibly share .


....and you thought I am writing about women empowerment or social upliftment. .not that they have been harrassed by their husbands.....neither did they have horrendous experiences with their kids but they have very fondly preserved themselves into a section that is their own space, the long long lost self-identity which most of us forget once woven into the beads of Life...be it marriage or any other occuption.
This was the most treasured secret behind Ekta Kapoor's success story. For those who knew a little much and were strongly self opiniated called it saree draped women saga...clad with makeup ...cooking Saas Bahu Sizzlers but I beg to differ....in the most humblest manners.and relate it to their own space which they would otherwise not have.
For thousands of successful men who have thankfully been doing well in their fields and have brought about some magnificent and drastic changes ,have had a one phenominal backbone to rest upon.no on else but their betterhalves.
So on this thanksgiving day ....thank those who have sacrificed their lives or may be settled for less for their own time, their career......just to watch us grow.....fondly played their role as a partner and even stood by as responsible siblings.
I am nothing but very proud to be born as a women especially in India.

No, I am only women as in me there lives a women who resides in every corner of the world every part of the society.
In me there lives a women who lives through her own dreams , has her own aspirations and wants to carve her own niche.
I am every women who is still capable of giving birth to a new life and yet sadly devoid of life sometimes even before birth.

I am every women who is so dearly loved yet raped, beaten ,abused , even murdered and mentally harassed . Sometimes in the most coveted manner , embedded deep down in the layers of the otherwise so well knit socialistic patterns.
This is in no way relates to women's social upliftment nor is it a reflection to the conventionally held sympathetic overview of women being the weaker sex. This is about a picture that is subconsciously drawn yet never surfaced completely.
This is an effort to visualise what could not be seen otherwise ...the silent contribution and yet self sacrifice in abundance.
Whenever I look at the eyes of my daughter who is hardly three, I have to reaffirm my confidence into the reality that there is a lot more that she would have to be groomed into rather than just being a responsible and educated citizen. I would rather accept the fact that men are from mars and women are from venus. They are two different people but cannot be compared as equals and that's definite in a country like mine; India, I would not want to speak for the rest of the world.
But the intensity and the scale that gauges the spirit and the celebration of being a women knows no boundaries nor any hard and fast rules.
I could be driving my home or may be the workplace and even the nation in the front seat but would be largely driven in reality in the rear by my male counter part. Trust there is no problem absolutely to lie in the comfort cocoon and bask in the low lying umbrella . However like me many have given up on their own identities and related very intelligently to their second in command roles.

The brigade in fact comprises both of homemakers and working women. A large chunk has already gone unnoticed and gracefully retired carrying forward the legacy through the reigns.A huge bouquette of appreciations and a huge round of applause for those who have obediently and submissively took over the roles for they are blessed to be called the genre of successfully and ideally leading their lives.
We have heard ,read , rejoiced and basked in the glory of the women of substance who have gracefully dominated the headlines and prominent columns of the best read dailies. But on the other side of the fence there lies a huge yet a very quiet race of women who have proved their metal and silently lead a life full of struggle and sacrifice.
I would rather put it this way... in an economy that is boasting of an astounding 8 percent growth....huge pools of money coming into and being the world's second largest growing capacity, we still have to go a very long way to make up for the plight of large chunk of it's female fraction.
On one side there is the BPO bandwagon , the FDI influx, the buzzing bollywood . the real estate boom , globalization of IT, wide pleothora of software solutions and on the other there is Sati Pratha, Dowry Deaths, Female Foeticide.
So are we truely a country of diversity ?
What is then holding us back ? Where do we go wrong ? Ask Americans and they would say, they really respect us for our values and social bonding, our culture.
With we becoming the Global Software Stalwarts there is much on the cards but sadly we still are a third world in terms of protecting our human resource base. This has largely to do with our socio economic status but more than that this has to change our thinking. The story starts and ends with the way we look at it. So should i name these as dogmas or clearly stigmas that are not leting us change our thinking and letting us grow beyond a point.
I would want to thank Kalpana Chawla straight fom the heart for the spirit she has embibed into us . More or less a women does not have always to be complete with a man. She can prove herself equally, think independently and can be a rezervoir of large untapped potential. If Kalpana could do it...why can't we ?

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